P a N i C . .. . .

Well, maybe Panic is too strong of a word....But I am definitely feeling the anxiety start to set it...

First of all, there are SO many things that I need to get done before I leave for rehearsal on the 18th. When I got back to NY after Christmas, it felt like I had forever, but I'm starting to feel the crunch. There is the blood test, the drug test, the full physical, the chest x-ray, the medical forms that have to be filled out, the background check, the contract, the tax forms, getting my room ready for my subletter....not to mention the PACKING! I am the world's worst packer. I stand there and alternately look at my suitcase and my closet hoping that inspiration will strike and somehow the perfect things will find their way to where they need to be. And I have no idea what to bring on this trip...at least with HAIRSPRAY, we had layoffs so that I could change things out when I had a week off in NY, but this being out to sea for 6 months! I guess that I should try not to worry...it's not like Europe is a third world country!

The rest of my anxiety stems from just starting something new...I don't like change (shocker, I know.) I like to know what I'm doing, I like to be familiar with my surroundings. And this is a lot of "New" - New shows, New home, New COUNTRIES, New friends, New colleges. In my head, I know that I'll be fine...I had these same feelings right before I started on the 'SPRAY and I LOVED being on that tour. I just have to get past the hump because I am soooo excited for this opportunity too and I can't not do things just because they scare me a little!

There is a favorite 'Peanuts' quote of mine:
"I think that I've discovered the secret of life - just hang around until you get used to it."

And I think that that about sums up my plan for the next month or so. :)